Why not?

I have been working for just about 2 full months now to loose some of this weight that I know I should loose. My desire to do it now is one that I don't fully understand. But the desire is there. And the actions are following. I have managed to maintain an average of a 5k per day since I did a 10k with my family and found myself suffering more than I wanted to be. I have worked out while sick and made it through. I can do this right? I hope so. I want to weigh less than 200lbs again. It has been a LONG time since I weighed less than 200lbs. Right now I am at 250.9. Which is up 1.5lbs from last week. Not a good thing and something that really made me want to say "Screw this. It's not worth the effort.". And after a few self loathing food decisions I jumped on the treadmill anyway. I want to RUN a full 5k and eventually finish a marathon without being swept off the course. No idea why I want to do that...I have never been much of a runner. Love hiking but never a runner... Who knows. But the desire is there. I want to do it. I want to have that as an accomplishment.
So today...instead of quitting and going back to bed I decided to jump on the treadmill, walk a brisk 5 minutes and alternate running with walking for the next 15 minutes as described in the Couch to 5k program. After completing that I completed the remainder of the 5k I promised myself to do each day.
I am feeling pretty great (aside from the weird ringing in my ear and the equilibrium issues I am suffering at the moment...not related I'm sure but strange none the less).
Last week I was under 250. This week I am over. But I will not let that get me down. Next week I will be back under 250 and on my way to below 200!! I am hoping to make it happen by summer. It would be really awesome to know what that felt like again. To see if I am really missing out on something I don't think I am right now.
Time will tell. But I feel differently than I have in the past when I have tried to loose weight.
I need to take more control over my food choices. Maybe pizza for three meals last week was a REALLY bad idea..then following it up with restaurant fajitas and 2 pina coladas wasn't the best of decisions. So I am working toward forgiving myself those things and moving forward.